That Green Stuff

This story was brought to you by PBL Inc.  And sponsored by Cool FM

I know it looks long but trust me its a great read!

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Having completed my first year in University, I’ve come to discover so many things, things that cannot be expressed in a blog, tweet, essay, words….you get the point….sure….Ok let’s move on.After thorough meditation which led to falling asleep incessantly, I can only express what I have come to discover in three words.

THAT SHIT CRAZY.

While in school, I learnt something that is very helpful, applicable to all and sundry, whether young or old, male or female, ugly or beautiful, tall or Simisola, white or ebony.

Whenever you a take a joint, please stay in an enclosed area or else…….

It all started on a cold Saturday morning, I was preparing for a school debate. I was in my room staring at the female hostel from my room, getting ideas and preparing for the debate (yeah….I’m bad like that.)Then I started to feel my stomach growling, shit happens I said……..literally. After using a drug, I felt better. Going back to prepare, I found out I was blank. Turns out when those people said “it cleans out your system” they weren’t joking.

So I sought out a remedy and I was told by Donneli that some weed might help.  I thought and decided at least I’m taking it for the right reason.

You know that feeling Obama had when he was elected in as the first nigga to be a president of USA…yeah….well it can’t be compared to what I felt after smoking a joint as big as Toke’s Bum.Everything was so clear, I mean I finally understood the message Vic O was trying to pass out, why Kanye only follows Kim K (Folks it’s not ‘cos of love…understood…Okay). While we were on our way all I could feel was peace! Peace in CU.

Am I there yet?

You see I met Peace immediately after taking the joint. Peace had a curve to die for, an ass that needed an entourage and a british accent. We started talking while on our way to the venue.When we arrived, Peace told me to loosen up adding that a very good way to start is by telling a smart joke. Only thing I could come up with was “Chuck Norris and Alomo had a fight, guess who’s bitter about that now”

Who’s bitter now?

I was called upon, and I was asked my name “Eluwande Yomi” adding “I’m also here with peace”. And them judges were like” we all are here with peace too”, I was amazed ‘cos apparently we all smoked the same joint this morning.In the middle of my debate Peace came up to me on stage, I was planning on telling her to go back but looked like them judges were comfortable with it. She instructed me to keep shut adding the Judges weren’t even listening to me at all and she was correct. Apparently they were all talking to their own version of Peace.

Wow! They are all identical!

Who? Mr Yomi..A Judge asked

Miss Peace…I said pointing to their sides.

Suddenly the judges started farting…

Oh, a farting contest innit? I said… then I started mine giving each sounds from Do Re Mi to Do

After we finished, they all started to do push-ups bare chested, and I joined! For some reason I was being recorded, my pictures were taken!

“Apparently this must be an official contest” I thought.  At this point Peace was even doing push-ups, apart from the fact that she had three tits, the only thing I found odd was that her right tit was bigger than the left. Odd Innit? That day became the worst in my life. Not because I didn’t win the debate, Not because of my antics, but because I never saw Peace again.Now no matter how high I looked or how many stones I left uncovered (did you see what I did there?) I never saw her again!

*sigh* Hope you learnt something new today?

Remember “Artists use lies to tell the truth” That chick’s father  from V for Vendetta

Drop your comments below.

DISCLAIMER

We at PBL would like to tell you that any gbagaun(funny word… isn’t it) found should be returned to the owner.

Whosoever was featured, ( Toke Simi Donneli ) I would like to thank you very much!

Thank You.

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Intro

Greetings mere mortals.
If you are on this page that means you were informed through subscription or your jobless ass just opened a random link on twitter.

Anyways I don’t care about how you got here all I know is you are on His Awesomeness’s page.

I go by the name Joe Kerr, you might have seen of my works in the “In my head” category……yeah that was me. I would just like to tell y’all that I would be dropping by sometimes for that mortal Yomi and making some posts. Now you better make sure your ass reads all of my posts or else………..

Now where’s that fool Yomi, been trying to guide him on the path of immortality but his sorry ass is just a dull fool.

Yo! I’m done typing!

I know, afterall…..

Will you STFU and let these people be on their way outta here.